In Parshas Devarim - read always on the Shabbos during the Nine Days before Tisha B’av - there is one posuk that many congregations have the minhag to lein in the Eichah tune.  In perek 1, posuk 12 we read about Moshe Rabbeinu telling Klal Yisrael that he can no longer bear dealing with all the disputes that arise between people.  He says, "Eichah esah livadi tarchachem umasachem virivchem?"  "How can I alone deal with all of your friction your burdens and your fights?"  The minhag to lein this posuk in the Eichah tune is not just because of the similarity of the words.  The Medrash writes that there is a connection between this "eichah" and the "eichah" we say at the beginning of Megillas Eichah, "Eichah yashvah badad"  Yirmiyahu asks how could it be that Yerushalayim has fallen to the ruins around him.  Rav Avigdor Nevenzhal explains that there is a profound connection between the two.  Chazal tell us that the Beis HaMikdash was destroyed "mipnei shedanu dineihem din Torah," that Jews were 100% strict in the laws to one another.  But that was it.  There was no giving in.  No being mivateir.  No lifnim mishuras hadin.  And that was exactly the issue Moshe Rabbeinu was facing.  He was being forced to adjudicate all manner of cases between people who should have been able to work it out on their own.  But no one would give in.  Rav Nevenzhal says there is another "eichah" that relates to this as well.  In parshas Bereishis, when Adam and Chava are "hiding" from Hashem, Hashem calls out to Adam and says "Ayekah?" - "Where are you?"  The letters of "ayekah" and "eichah" are identical - only the nekudot are changed.  Explains Rav Nevenzahl that that is the real question.  Ayekah?!  Where are YOU?  Following the Torah and the Shulchan Aruch are critical.  But never forget that that is not an expression of you.  When we go lifnim mishuras hadin for one another, when we go out of our way to help others, that is who we are.  When we are out of a set schedule and not in a framework where everything is dictated to us and laid out for us, that is when we have the opportunity to show who we are.  And that is the question we have to face on Tisha B’av.  Ayekah?